Ep. 35: Our Love Story & My Thoughts On Marriage

Apparently a lot of you really want to know how E & I met and started dating because this episode comes highly requested!

Well, wait no further as this episode will go through how we met, the 1.5 year journey from meeting to dating, the ups and downs along the way, the reservations we had about dating and how E officially asked me out. To cap the episode off, I chat about the most asked question: are we ever getting married? I share my thoughts on marriage, whether or not we will get married and how not being married brings a lot of judgment.

Buckle up because this episode has lots of highs and lows and ends with me crying.

As always, if you want to connect with me on Instagram: jeshessels

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Love you all

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Jessica takes us back to January of 2014. At this time, she was still with her ex boyfriend and studying at Humber College, finishing up her 4th year of her paralegal degree program. Emmanuel was also attending Humber College for Police Foundations.

Jessica had recently started going to the school gym, and this is where she initially met Emmanuel who loves working out at the gym. Jessica didn’t have much confidence at the time, hated being in the weight area and struggled to work out around so many guys. She spent a lot of time in the studio doing stretches and core work. It was basically where she hung out for a long period of time.

One day, while Jessica was in the studio Emmanuel came up to her and asked if she did gymnastics. Jessica remembers thinking that this was either the world’s worst pickup line or he doesn’t know how flexible people need to be for gymnastics. But either way, it was something to connect the two and get them talking. However, Jessica still had her boyfriend at the time and so they remained acquaintances who would chit chat here and there around the gym and when they saw each other on campus.

In A Limbo Stage

Over the course of a year, things started to fall apart with Jessica’s ex. Eventually he broke up with her, but she still felt very connected with him. She still cared about him, loved him and held onto the idea that he would get his life together. Jessica was not ready to give up the relationship and he continued to live with her, even though the two weren’t together.

During that year, Jessica started to talk to other guys. She slowly started coming to the realization that this wasn’t going to work out but she wasn’t fully ready to let him go. She was in this in-between limbo stage that was unhealthy and toxic. Jessica found herself sneaking around behind her ex's back, and even though they weren’t together, she still felt it was wrong of her to be talking or hanging out with other guys at the time.

Emmanuel and Jess started to talk more as they saw each other at school and the gym. They started to connect more as friends, but when Emmanuel would ask Jessica to hang out, Jessica would suggest getting food rather than spending time at either of their places. Jessica didn’t feel ready to go to Emmanuel’s place, and he obviously couldn’t come to Jessica’s place because her ex still lived with her. It was just easier to not be somewhere private.

Emmanuel started to notice that the two of them would never hang out alone. And at some point, Jessica posted a picture of her ex on her Instagram. Something made her feel hopeful about the relationship at the time. Emmanuel saw it, gathered what was going on, and understood. But he was also a little bit pissed off because Jessica wasn’t being truthful about the situation at the time.

Emmanuel is 4 years younger than Jessica, and they met when Emmanuel was 18. It’s not that he was upset that Jessica was potentially seeing someone else, but rather that he was annoyed she was lying and being sketchy about things. Emmanuel and Jessica continued to hang out and became fast friends. Jessica confided in Emmanuel and opened up about what was going on with her ex.

I’ll Never Date Him

In March of 2015, things had gotten so bad with Jessica’s ex that she finally ended things with him. And after that, Emmanuel and Jessica started hanging out more and more. While all of this was going on, Jessica was telling her friends that there was no way she would ever date Emmanuel. He was quite a bit younger than her and was still in the party phase of his life. She was saying all this to her friends, while Emmanuel was also telling his friends that he’d never date Jessica. They were just hanging out and having fun.

By that summer, Jessica started to fall for Emmanuel as they started to hang out even more. She started to realize that she really liked this guy. They were going to each other’s places and working out together at the gym. But Jessica felt worried and a little confused as to how she truly felt. Was she ready for a serious relationship?

When they were alone together, Emmanuel was kind, really funny, and smart. And Jessica liked these things about him. But he acted differently in group settings. Jessica knows now that it was the 19-year-old mentality. He was young and wanted to fit in. But Jessica saw a side of him when they were alone together that she really liked. Emmanuel was intellectual, wanted to have serious conversations, and was articulate. But in public, Jessica couldn’t stand him.